From Miss Independent to Miss Depended On


Minus the alcoholic beverage, this picture just about sums up my life. Add some laundry, baby spit up, some colicky tendencies, and postpartum high blood pressure issues && you just might understand what it is like becoming a mom. MAYBE….

Now I am fully aware that no two stories are the same, but from the outpouring of love && support from my family//friends, and social media gurus, I am learning that more times than none, we have all experienced the same things when becoming mamas.  I guess the parts that make it different fall on a more emotional level &&how we handle things mentally.

Pre Clayton days, I was this crazy independent women ((still am)), always on the go, striving for more. I would do whatever I wanted, whenever I wanted.  Maybe it was because of my childhood upbringing, or the fast paced world we live in, but either way, I would jump at any opportunity regardless of the outcomes.  I depended on no one.   What I had, I earned.  What I wanted, I worked my ass off for.  I was emotionally strong, because I had to be. I built walls around me.  No one or nothing could hurt me ((anymore)).


After Clayton, those emotions began to break down.  I found myself vulnerable again. When he cried, I cried.  When he was in pain, I was in pain.  When he was happy, I was happy ((&& still cried)).  His being; his little life, stripped me raw. I am emotional in every sense of the way.  I fear like I’ve never feared.  I call my pediatrician like they are my own personal help.  I get stressed much faster and much easier.  I feel like I get nothing accomplished && struggle to find the time to eat.  I used to be so scheduled about everything in life. NOW, a schedule?  What is that anyways?  Is it Monday?  What month are we even in?  The days fly by in a blink of an eye && yet sometimes I feel like they aren’t moving at all.

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BUT he has taught me how to feel love much deeper, hope much stronger && believe much harder. I went from being Miss Independent to Miss Depended On.  I am forever a mom first.  I am forever loved by this sweet boy.  I am forever changed.  I am forever blessed.  Because he is everything I’ve ever wanted && more, that makes any feeling I experience so worth it.  ❤

No matter how we handle becoming a mother, we all experience what it means to love a child unconditionally, no strings attached.  We all become a Miss Depended On && I know I wouldn’t have it any other way.


imagesTanya ❤


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